Growing up

I see myself growing out of the “BA” stage in my life and moving into a stage where I want to be more mature and look more “adult-ish.” I have been thinking a lot about myself and what I see when I look in the mirror. I know that in the past I struggled with hiding behind my piercings and attitude to put on a face of someone I was never meant to be. When I look in the mirror now, I see a girl who wants to escape this image and just be herself. I don’t want to hide behind the metal and BA attitude. I counted how many piercings I have and I have 12. I feel like I have held onto this number for a long time and in the process of holding onto this number my mindset wants to make the number increase so I have something new to show off. Now don’t get me wrong, I absolutely love piercings and tattoos, but I think I have went past the line of just liking them to being obsessed with them, as stupid as that sounds. I guess I have been giving it a lot of thought and I have come to the conclusion that I want to take some of my piercings out. I want to take them out because I am tired of hiding behind them. I am also thinking about taking out my gauges. It’s all an image thing for me I guess. I have these things because when I see people with gauges, tattoos, and piercings I automatically think “wow theirs a BA” and it’s something I thought I wanted…but I don’t. I want to be able to wear normal earrings without the hassle and I want to be able to dress up without having that rough edge to me because of all the metal on my face. Maybe I am looking into this too much, but it’s just a thought I wanted to share.