Cha Cha slidee

I am sitting in the dark with just the light of the computer screen shining on my face. I stared at the keys for a moment and began to type, just anything that came to mind…

I can’t lift up my head because it feels so heavy

The weight of this world is too much to carry

I can barely find the strength to look up

I found myself crying out to God in despair

Searching for a sign that He is still there

I begged and begged for Him to hear my cry

I’ll admit to myself

I can’t run my own life; I’m too weak to try

But I realized I was praying alone

Calling out the name of a God not known

Lying face down on an empty floor

Every wall crumbled with the lack of a cornerstone

So I searched the sky for a God unknown

Looking into the blackness where nothing was shown

I fell to my knees and called out again

In hope that it was a mistake

That maybe He couldn’t hear me

Something must have got in the way

But the silence rang in my ears as the night turned to day

I felt enclosed and alone with nothing left to say

If God’s not there when I call out His name

I’ll turn my back and deal with the pain

All I hear is the ticking of a clock and the sound of the dog pacing back and forth on the upstairs wood floor. I don’t want to say what I wrote is the truth because it’s not. I just wrote it. I don’t really understand why it came out like that; maybe it’s because it’s how I feel. My stubbornness says “no” but who really knows the truth. At first I was hesitant about putting this up because it could be interpreted in different ways…but then I thought “I don’t really care what people think” so now it’s up for the world to see.

I must admit, I have had an amazing Thanksgiving Break. I feel like one lucky girl who has an amazing family she never even knew she had. Hope everyone’s was as great as mine!